Giving Your Full Attention

This afternoon, a friend tells me about a seminar she attended.  She describes the teacher as someone who "gave his full attention to each person." 

It seemed incredible--his focus, his intensity--that he could give to a person asking him a question.  Remarkable in his love and concern, this teacher left the kind of impression my friend had to describe to me.  Every person held his interest.  Every person was important enough for his full attention.     

Later, my husband wants to discuss a decision we need to make.  I'm fiddling with a camera, thinking about vacuuming, considering blogging about making sushi with my daughter, worrying about brushing my cats enough, planning my syllabus in my head, missing the Italian Mama, craving chocolate. . .

"May I please have your full attention?"

I sit down, look into his eyes, listen to his words, notice his hand gestures, consider his intonations.  For once, I zero-in with my full attention.  Everything else can wait.

I realize that when I withhold my full attention, I communicate to others that I don't find them important, interesting, or worthy.  How arrogant!  How self-focused!  I want to offer my full attention.  Everything else can wait.

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Journal:  Who needs your full attention?

A Message from a Pandora Sphinx Moth

I arrive into my driveway, and an enormous Pandora Sphinx Moth greets me.  The moth--as big as my own hand--sits with authority as if sent to deliver a message.   We think, at first, a leaf attached itself to our door.  But then we see clearly.

Watch carefully.  Things are not what they seem. 

Pandora Sphinx Moth © Live with Flair

When you have a Pandora Sphinx Moth welcoming you home, you feel as if you're in another land with enchanted creatures.  Anything can happen here.  Look again, and you'll see wonderful things. 

I lean in and observe the velvety wing.  What a strange and curious world this is!  Even when I'm inside my house (folding laundry, cleaning dishes), I know the moth guards my door.  Just remembering that such a beautiful and mysterious insect exists somehow brings delight and wonder to the whole morning.  Living with flair means taking some time to observe the strangely beautiful. 

Pandora Sphinx Moth Wing © Live with Flair

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Journal:  What strangely beautiful thing did you see today?

Verb of the Week

This morning, I talk to a student about the verb "rehabilitate."  It means to restore to normal, to recover, to reestablish good working order.  In terms of physical therapy, this verb represents hope.

Physical therapists know that rehabilitation happens in the context of a whole network of support:  individual, family, and community.  You aren't alone in the journey towards restoration.   It takes time, and we are all in this together. 

I think about this today because of the post-travel anxiety and moodiness I experience!  Nothing feels normal around here.  I'm rehabilitating--even still--from all those years of depression and anxiety.  Good days, bad days, hopeful days, hopeless days.

I'm learning not to fear the bad days anymore.  There's a true self that emerges when you let even the darkness out. 

It helps that my neighbors tell me that their friendship isn't dependent on my good, stable moods. 

Living with flair means we see life as a rehabilitation process.   As communities, we journey together patiently and offer one another the deepest, most beautiful hope.  Good days, bad days.  We are all in this together.

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Journal:  Are you rehabilitating, too?